Monday, April 6, 2015

Art Of Dying


At what point a person feel like dying? When a person feels much tensed and become completely hopeless or when a person feels so alone and the past memories randomly haunt him/her. Some people may be struggling with cancer or some kind of incurable diseases. Some people have a obsession of thinking. They ruminate over a small issue and end their life because of that. I don’t know how many people had ended their life in this lonely planet but as they did end their life, they had some purposes of doing so.
If you really want to die then let’s not choose a futile death. If you want to die then choose a brave kind of death. Choose a kind of death that will give you a spark of life at every moment you try to jump into it. Die with passion. With utmost compassion. Die for the whole humanity. Die for your country. Die for your passion but don’t die for someone who doesn't give a damn about you. Die for someone who really does care about you. Feel the breeze of death when you try to inhale the breath of life .If you are alone then that’s the biggest gift you have ever received from the divine. You can educate yourself through books. You can listen to your favorite music. Wake up early. See the dawn. Say goodbye to dusk. Be thankful to the sunlight. Love the rain. Go anywhere you like. A single beautiful soul can impart the rare treasure of love and kindness to the world around it. Smile and help people to smile.
Appreciate being alive in an awesome planet. If you are creative that is a great asset you will ever have. Compose poems, paint, and write your heart out. Sing. Dance. Don’t care about what people say or do. Listen to your heart. Make your own choices. Die an awesome accidental death. Like falling from the mountain while hiking. Doing different kind of adventurous sport. If you want to die don’t invite a death at your own cost. Show the death how far you can go with your life.
Talk to the people around you. At your workplace. At school. College. Wherever you are .Provide them a good listening ear. Everybody has something to say. Listen to them. Keep your mind open. Be curious .Seek for knowledge. Everybody has got something. Help someone with the knowledge you earn from someone. If something disappoints you then don’t think much about it. Forgive the one who have hurt you. Don’t be hopeless. There’s a light at the end of the tunnel. keep a pet at your house. Talk with them. Play with them. They will ease your stress. You will feel relief.
If you don’t find anyone to share your problems. I am here for you all. I may not be good at counseling. But talking with someone if you feel good then I will be glad to provide you my listening ear and understanding heart.
Thank you for reading. Wish you for your wonderful time.

Saturday, April 4, 2015

A Saloon Story

                                                                        
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Small saloon in the corner of hectic road. Peoples walking with big mustache, beard, long styled hair, some curlies, some straight, some dread locked, some as straight as pine leaves, porcupine thrones. Does hairstyle reflect person’s personality? What about attitude? Mansoor may not have a proper answer for this kind of question but he can nod and say something out of his deep experience. May be the person who share their stories might have certain impact upon him while he move his scissor and comb on their different styled hair. He may have been shaving his pain like a razor blade over their face. Hair and beard grows time and again. Same is the pain. May be his pain grows faster than the sluggish beard. His youthful and meek face may not have the wrinkles of sadness but nobody knows how many times he has massaged his own mind during those painful moments he had endured. People come to have facial and always envy him about the money he earns. They are mostly those people who are still having the grains strewed by their parents. Unemployed and a true addict of cigarette and weeds. Their dreams are like cigarette fumes. Decaying life. Unconscious in a trance state aided by weeds. Mansoor knows his work but forgets his health because he has to open his shop, pay the rent of shop and his room so he never has a time to eat properly. He is single but he always find himself in midst of the crowd. Even when he returns back to his room late at night he carries that crowd within himself. So he is never a lonely guy. His old mother often calls him and pleads for money. He has to send some money to his village. He don’t want to recall those ,starry nights of thunder and heavy downpour where he was compelled to sleep with hunger glancing at the leaked roofs of his small hut. Hunger didn't scare him that time. A howling and forcing wind scared him which could have anytime blown his feeble roof.

“Hay Mansoor?”  Why don’t you change that music?” A commanding and little annoying voice shifted his attention towards the Old cassette player which his father had bought long before he died of cholera when mansoor was small.

An oily person of mid 30 was sitting on a tool and with half shaved beard his reflected images on the mirror resembled that of a betrayed fool. Mirror wasn't clean. There were patches of dirt stuck like an artistic dot. If one would glance at it deeply they would find different images which was barely conceivable.

A melodious Hindi song reverberated in the room. He seems to have been enjoying it. So he slowly closed his eyes while mansoor began shaving rest of his beard.

Seldom people ask him to change the music. Changing music is not a hard job for mansoor, he is not even unwilling to do that, but the hard thing is to fulfill the desire of every customer who enters in saloon with their own kind of desire to look good in every possible way. He can feel their aesthetic needs. People are gifted with their kind of beauty but they want to embrace the beauty of other.

“How much?”

His face looked like a ragged jeans after shaving. He leisurely puts his hands in the back pocket, took out 50 rs note and lifted on the air giving an unsure look.

“Yes its 50” Mansoor replied just dredging a towel and putting it back on the chair.

Then a ragged face guy took away his red sun-glass parked on the wooden desk. He didn't smile back.
 Mansoor has glued the colorful posters of Bollywood slinky and seducing actress on the patchy walls of the saloon. It aids in stimulating sensual feelings of the customer. It seems as those images calmly hold them for a quarter or an half on the wooden high backed uncomfortable chair. Music works as an ingredient or some kind of additives for fidgeted heart.

Those rough and tough guys strolling around the saloon gives bad headache to mansoor. They have made saloon their usual junction for talking mundane things that doesn't make much sense for the ideal person. Their baleful glance and nasty outlook often frighten him .Their very presence in the saloon is like a possible landslide, huge volcanic havoc and terrorizing symptoms of possible earthquake for the feeble heart like Mansoor’s. His hearts beats in a distressful pace, his hands shakes and anger boils inside as they enter into the saloon and use his spray, combs, towels and creams without any kind of formal request or permission. He is aware of the fact that they can be dangerous to him anytime so he has smothered his voice and curbed his courage.


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Today the sun is cloaking beside the cloud. Mansoor knows that it’s already morning..His mobile is out of breath. Begging for battery life. There’s not so much gloomy outside as compared to the gloominess of mansoor’s mind. He has a little sickness escalating from the toes to his head making him look little bit blue and dull on his bed. Yesterday he forgot his lunch, worked like a Himalayan yak or meek donkeys. Ate his dinner at 10 and it was like chopping a big whale into tiny pieces and then eating like a vulture who doesn't know anything about the culture.

He wore his full sleeve shirt. Orange like an orange. Checkered orange. White and orange. It’s like replacing the black with orange in a chessboard.  When mansoor reached at his shop, he glanced at his watch. Needles are resting on the 9 and 12.Small brother resting on 9 and big brother resting on 12.Big brother is desperately waiting for the lean brother doing round ups.

He pushed his shutter. It was hard to push. It needed some grease for sure. Mansoor may have acknowledged it but he always forgets. He usually gets  lost in his routine. There were no vehicles today. He didn't see much people walking on the street. He watched around. Shops were closed. Some half open. Cat or dogs could easily pass through them. But he saw people over there making transactions .He couldn't understand things going around him. Is it a strike today? Some kind of bandha’s? who did it anyway? For what? Will they compensate him for that? He has to pay 400 per day as a rent to the house owner. Do house owner excuses him for this particular day? No he won’t. Mansoor didn't want to go back to his room closing his shop just because it’s a strike. He is earning his living by hard work. He toils around all day long for his living, for his family. He couldn't understand why such kind of strikes is snatching the bread of an honest laborer? One group goes in the power, escalates and dwells in a big tower. With binoculars they watch layman. They haven’t yet observed the real pain of the people in a microscope. There are numerous sides of people and there are numerous slides of pain, of suffering, of dreams, of desires, of wish which needed to be placed in the microscope of the state and observed thoroughly.

Mansoor didn't get chance to ruminate much. He feels as his right to think has been infringed by some strange noises. It soars high like a violent storm hitting the unbolted door. He finds the section of brick smacked at his shop which comes with the nerve-wrecking motions sliding at his feet. Angry crowds enter his shop with the big wooden stick. Mirrors fall into pieces  like his heart. Helpless chair lies prostrate on the floor. Blood comes sprouting from his head. He couldn't understand what those angry faces are yelling at him. He just finds chunks of frustration dotted in their face like an indelible stain. He finds his eardrum resonating a peculiar sound. Then the crowd leaves. He lies there on the floor like a lifeless chair.